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The one in which the emotionally unavailable man tells you he loves you

Tiff Reagan
3 min readApr 11, 2018

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Distant, aloof, lackadaisical? No, he’s probably not a sociopath. It is much more likely that he’s just not ready to be vulnerable.

Photo by Ivana Cajina on Unsplash

Imagine this: One hypothetical night, a man has two too many martinis and texts you. During the past few weeks or months, he has been so hot and cold that you have already decided to write him off. Maybe you want to give him a taste of his own medicine. He’s a little drunk, so he tries to be cute and affectionate. You act standoffish. You may or may not accuse him of being cavalier and of losing interest. Way to stay the course, girl! Then this happens:

Now what are you supposed to do? Remember, this scenario and that text are completely hypothetical…not real at all. Definitely didn’t happen to me.

Your first reaction isn’t the right reaction
I know that trusting your gut is always the right answer, but your instincts are irrelevant in this moment. If you are anything like me, your heart melts when you see the combination of “love” and “you.” Don’t melt. Don’t forgive his trespasses and tell him that you’ve been waiting to hear those words. Why? Because he’s not spouting unsolicited sonnets or making grand romantic gestures. He’s not apologizing for his actions, he’s simply panicking. How you respond is crucial. Recognize that reactions set up…

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Tiff Reagan
Tiff Reagan

Written by Tiff Reagan

Author of Be Happy, B*tch. Tiff is a storyteller, a poet and a public servant. She loves summer in Oregon, her dog Roosevelt and the smell of old books.

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